Monday, December 31, 2007

New Year's Eve with The Misfats

Where: The Matador, 1967 W. Burnside St., Portland

When: We start at 11:30pm and play for a good hour; they just wanna make sure we ring in the new year. Which we will. Most fat-ly.

Cost: Your stomach or your head or your soul, the next day...

See you there!

Thursday, December 27, 2007

And another show!

Also, hopefully, we have a show at The Matador on New Year's Eve!

Yep, The Matador, 1967 W. Burnside. Go figure.

Just us, welcoming in the New Year, all jiggly/all guts/all fun.

It'll fill up early if it happens, fo' sho'.

See you fat-fiends there!

Monday, November 26, 2007

Upcoming show alert!

Planning on having the post-Christmas blues? Then shove THIS in your stocking!

Sat Dec 29th
Ash St Saloon
$6 cover
Music at 9:00pm
The Misfats
Shock Troops - Cocksparrer Tribute band
Fist of Dishonor - Ninja Rock band
Sunken Chest - Portland's Loudest Pirate Rock band

That's the current lineup, anyway. Should be a veritable "hoot!"

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Ash St., Halloween 2007

Ah, where to begin discussing our return to the stage after six long months without?
Let's just say we practiced twice, have no merch, and had a great time, as usual.

Lots of people turned out in costume for this Sat. show. Our favorites were the street basketball team that kept running into the traffic outside to get in some quality hoops (but, you know, minus the hoops).

We played 2nd on the four-band bill and that's our sweet spot. We're not too tired and folks typically get drawn in by the first band, stay for the 2nd and (hopefully!) 3rd band, then start to trickle out for the 4th. That's the pattern we witnessed at this show, too.

Sunken Chest kicked things off in their rawkin', naughty-cal way, then we got up there. Choosing not to make set lists prior to taking the stage ("choosing" - riiiiight) we played it a bit by ear but felt pretty good about it all. I could tell midway through Diet Diet My Darling that my voice was in good form - something I'd been paranoid about during our previous two practices. I also remembered what Dr CHOAD told me, too: "Lousy practice, great show; great practice, lousy show." Amen to that.

Baloney had his share of candy to throw out, as did CHOAD, who scored a direct hit on the USS Hamzinger with a Ding Dong squarely placed amidships. I only got hit with three others that night so it's good we stick to the softer goodies. The crowd was a fun mix and really seemed to both get into us and to get us. That's nice when that happens, lemme tell ya'. They were even as outraged as us when I announced that, for some inexplicable reason, The Misfats would not be opening for Danzig when he comes through PDX this Sunday. I could give 'em all a hug for that response, really I could.

The rest of the set was fun and longer than we'd anticipated. We really did sound like we hadn't taken any time off, too, and that felt pretty darn good as well. The "Nikki Sixx" from Same Old Situation later told me that he was at the bar, in the far rear of the club, and people were singing along to us even there. Heck, I'm even using the photos on this post from a friend who I'll now call a fan. Everyone seemed to be into both us and having a good time. I ended the set feigning a heart attack (and getting out of the crowd's way to witness CHOAD) but didn't go completely down. An older audience member later scolded me, saying I should have, that they had placed bets on which one of us would drop. I let her know, "Hey, once my tonnage goes down it's damn hard to get it back up again, ya' know?" But it seems like a good idea for the future. Hmmm...
Motley Crue tribute act Same Old Situation followed, nailing their impersonations to a capital "T". Motorbreath followed, sticking primarily to the first four Metallica albums, much to the larger crowd's chagrin. When they launched into Battery, tho', CHOAD and I were right there, punching that one in. Good guys who will not have their enthusiasm drowned out by anything - always a good show with Motorbreath on board, lemme tell ya'.

So, all in all, a good night for a return show. Thanks again to everyone that came or stuck around for us.

(Pix courtesy of The Mighty Cesar)

Friday, October 26, 2007


Just gotta love this pic - from the City Island, NY, show, in June 2006.

See you all this Saturday!

Wednesday, October 24, 2007


That's right, folks - our now-annual Halloween show is taking place on Saturday, Oct. 27th, in lovely downton Portland, at the Ash St. Saloon.

The lineup's changed quite a bit since first we signed on but, at last look, it was listed as such:

Sat Oct 27th
Music at 9:15pm
Monster Mash-Bash ~ Come as your Favorite Monster
Motorbreath - Metallica Tribute Band
Same Ol' Situation - Motely Crue Tribute Band
The Misfats - Misfits Tribute band
Sunken Chest - Pirate Cover Band

That is one heckuva lineup, fatfiends! Come on out and see how rusty we are! See our snobby asses get handed to us when we play our first show since 2007 SxSw! Weep with joy, reek of booze, and revel in our Legacy of Obesity!

Monday, June 25, 2007


Noun, to take a well-deserved break so we don't burn out on this and so we don't burn YOU out on this, either.

Look for the 'fats to return Sept. or Oct., 2007.

More info will be posted here when we gots it. Meanwhile, get out and support the bejeebus outta local bands.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Monday, March 26, 2007

More proof

that we really were at SXSW!

One attendee took short clips of many of the bands he saw; the compiled video - featuring us about 2/3 of the way through - is available here.

A Canadian attendee reported on it in their local paper, nicely for us as well. Houston was in attendance, too, and gives an unique perspective here. Note who's piccy is featured in both articles?

And here was Portland's own The Mercury's take on it all. Just draw your attention to that last line and you'll know what it's like to be a non-emo or pop or post-punk band in PDX.

Yes, the Misfats did indeed play SXSW 2007

Only now am I just recovering, I think. That's alotta walking and standing for large folks, to be sure, but very much well worth it. We arrived in Austin on Friday afternoon. After some hotel hassle and logistics wrangling we headed down to the convention center and retrieved our wristbands and badge. These magical items were our wampum for playing on Sunday night and they allowed us entry pretty freely the nights' prior.

After drinking much, eating more, seeing many, many bands, and being brought low by the rapturous frozen blended joy known as "Purple" (from the messican joint next door to our hotel) we were finally ready for our time in the sun. Sunday night only featured, like, three locations for music so it was a nice, easy day - altho' Emo's did have another stage in their main bar area going on most of the night as well. I think I saw many people retreat there after peeking in on us, to be certain.

But at least Emo's carried Sparks so we were well set. It's a fantastic place, for those that haven't been or played, btw. The green room is in a sorta quonset hut on the top of the place and you take some rickety, narrow stairs to access it. While you're doing that, though, the stage folks are soundchecking your gear - yes, you heard it correctly. That was a nice new thing for us, fo' sho'. We'd brought guitars and cymbals and the stage manager (I think?) got us a backline of gear from one of the earlier acts of the night to use for our own flatulent purposes. That, too, was pretty sweet.

After a "confrontational" opening punk act that was pretty fun, there was Big Balls, a Bon Scott-era AC/DC tribute. I gotta say, their lead singer had some serious pipes and did a spot-on sound, even tho' the local freebie rag wouldn't publish the word "balls" in its entirety in the ad for the show. The Jazzus Lizard was up next, performing jazz covers of Jesus Lizard songs. A few folks hung around but not many; altho', to be fair, folks just moved from one section of the bar to the other during acts they didn't "get" or care much for (perspective is everything, innit?). The Suffragettes were up next, a stellar, spot-on Bowie tribute covering "Spiders From Mars" in its entirety. This was only their second show but you'd never know it as they were a great lead-in for us and provided alot of positive energy for the crowd to feed upon.

We got to the stage at about 12:45am and proceeded to tear into things proper. Maybe it was the stature of the event or the amount of Sparks we'd consumed but we all seemed pretty stoked AND virulent in our trash-talking. Normally, there's a fair amount of conversation I'll generate but it's usually just me, not everyone in the freakin' band. That, too, was a nice change. Here are some highlights of our set:

  • Foil launching into his big guitar solo out over the crowd, just going for it balls-out, only to discover he'd accidentally unplugged his guitar in stepping out there
  • Our two Ding Dong eating contestants who failed to grasp the concept that this was an eating contest and proceeded to throw said Ding Dongs out into the crowd
  • Said female contestant flash titties and nearly raping Jerry Baloney
  • Another female flashing us titty and only I see it
  • Female contestant trying to jump up on me only to rip my shoulder to shreds with her rings and such
  • A fan showing up in fantastic skullface makeup
  • A drunk, fun-loving, loyal crowd sticking around on a Sunday night until 2am

Would we do it again? Absolutely! Everyone treated us pretty well, we made some good connections with BloodHag and Jello Biafra again, and had a great time all around. Maybe we'll pull this thing out, dust it off, and repeat next year? Who knows. As for this present time, tho', let the pictures tell the remainder of the tale...

Us on stage, walkin' like we're talkin':

I love this guy's reaction to our patented "BackFat"(tm):
Us with the Emo's sign in the background to prove it (note, too, Skullface Fan front & center):
Again, gotta love the varied crowd reactions to us taking to the stage:
An artsy interpretation of the 'fats:

See? We really were at Emo's:

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

SxSw - update!

In case you didn't know, we're playing the mighty SxSw this year (don't ask me how/why, okay? 'cuz I just don't know). They recently posted the list of bands playing there in support of The Misfats, too. Check it out here. Hopefully, soon, they'll post the venues and lineups. Just an FYI, we're playing the main stage at Emo's on Sunday, 18 March.

Digg this!

Friday, February 09, 2007

Just glad to be here...

This past Wednesday witnessed two great events in a single night: the return of Darkbuster to the comfy confines of PDX and the resurrection of iknowkungfu. Red Flag Warning filled in 'round the edges nicely with splendidly noisy punk, too. Oh, the 'fats played last but, by then, we'd had our fun of the night. We were more like the buddy that drives your car home 'cuz you had too much fun (you hearin' me, Craft?).

In I think Year 2000 'fu played with Darkbuster in Vancouver, WA, in a place that had to be closed for good afterward (I'm not kidding). We had a fabulously drunk evening and remember it fondly. DB went on their way and on to hiatus; 'fu, also, went on their way and on to hiatus (for all intents and purposes). Then, about 15 months ago, DB came through our neck of the woods again, this time in support of the Dropkicks (and Gang Green!). This encounter led to the 'fats crashing into their hometown of Boston (rough night) and playing in Providence, RI, with them, building yet another show of fantastic memory and proportions. We just all seem to jell exceedingly well - must be the booze talkin'.

So pleased were we to have DB come out our way yet again that iknowkungfu decided to reform and join in the festivities with the 'fats. The original show with them on a Friday got swapped out for a Wednesday night gig. Were we worried? Not in the slightest! Well, okay, maybe a little - we wanted this to be a great stop for them on their tour, to spread the infectious love of their music and live shows amongst our fellow natives. But after seeing the sheer number of friends, family, and fans come out and stay out and put it all out there on a school night - well, let's say our fears were obviously unjustified. You don't keep around bands as much fun as DB and 'fu without relying on their crowd-gathering, crowd-pleasing ability. (Sure the 'fats gather a crowd but it's like a group coming over for a look at the fat guy stuck in the booth at McDonald's.)

A new condition did arise, tho', upon arrival at the Ash St. Apparently Danny, DB's drummer, had some "boy-stuff issues" and had to go to the emergency room. Concern over his well being abounded as we sought out potential backup drummers ("Do you know what a drum kit is? No? Okay, get lost"). Thankfully he was alright and showed up a little later.

iknowkungfu started off the evening then and, Sweet Mother of All, were they loud. I don't remember 'em being this loud when I saw 'em so often previously. Maybe that's what a break does for you? In any case and inebriation aside, they brought it fast and furious and fun. DB's Lenny even got up to perform "Liquor" with them and it just felt right. Looking around the crowd, with them on stage, you did a little bit of the Time Warp to four or five years previous. Like old friends you haven't seen in a long time you just pick up immediately where you left off and it feels damn good.

After RFW finished DB got setup. It took 'em a little longer than usual due to the fact that their horn section had flown into town to join their tour that day. How cool is that? So, with sax & trombone ready at the wings, DB just tore into it and didn't relent. The crowd was very enthusiastic in all the ways you want 'em to be. It was nice to dust off the ol' dance moves, too, in only the way seeing DB in action can give you. The crowd called out for more and they gave us one additional; then Lenny apologized all over the place for "daring" to cut into the Misfats set time. He was, like, honestly concerned. And I just kept laughing at the notion. I think that's what makes us work together so well - just honest blokes with no egos getting to play music they love in front of folks that wanna hear it. Makes you feel good, too.

So, late in the day, the 'fats appear. We were pretty tired, for the most part, and it felt kinda laborious. I know my voice had had it for the night and that ain't good. I don't wanna disappoint but there's only so much you can muster when you're pretty drunk and obese, ya' know? Huh - we should write a song about it... All in all, we performed, not our best set but definitely well received by the many kind souls that stuck it out late on a Wednesday for us and the other bands.

Again, this is one of those shows we would've been at much less played it. It's an honor to share the stage with the likes of these bands, a great motivator, and just a freakin' blast to be had by all.

Now I already want DB to come back through so we can do it again. Oh, well.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

The 'fats Who Came In From the Cold

Great show last Saturday at the Ash Tray. I was a bit worried that the recent cold snap would keep folks off the streets and outta the clubs. I was certainly and gladfully wrong.

Getting to the place early soundgal-and-booker extraordinaire Heather laments that there's only one heater working in the place. Fantastic. Turns out, thanks to the populous crowd, that's actually a blessing for the evening.

The show starts about 9:40pm with Shock Troops, a local Cock Sparrer tribute band. Thankfully, I didn't have to keep spending my time telling people who Cock Sparrer were after these guys started in. I go back a ways with my appreciation of that band so I was one of the (I think) six others who could sing along, every line of every song they covered. They stuck pretty much to the album of the same name, "Shock Troops," plus a couple others thrown in for good measure (like "Because You're Young"). I think others in the audience who weren't as familiar with the original band still got into it, too, tho'. I mean, how could you not? Take a listen to "Take 'Em All" or "We're Comin' Back," drown a few beers, and it's easy to see its appeal.

Next up were Motorbreath. I (and several other 'fats) are particular about our Metallica, thinking that that band's true creativity died with Cliff. I think Motorbreath begrudgingly used a couple tracks off of the "black" album but, otherwise, stuck to the holy trinity of source material, "Kill 'Em All," "Ride the Lightning," and "Master of Puppets." And they freakin' nailed it, my friends. These are some highly talented shreddists tackling this stuff and they do it severe justice. We were very happy to have shared a stage with 'em and look forward to future opportunities. The cross-pollination of fans between us and them is pretty strong, too - a natural fit, if you will - and provides great entertainment for all sorts of fans. (There - my marketing pitch is now in place and DONE!)

The crowd usually seems to swell for the 2nd band and, in Motorbreath's case, deservedly and understandably so. However, as we hit the stage around 12:15am, the crowd was still pretty thick and into it. They had a pit going for just about our entire set which we haven't seen in a long time (first John Henry's show in Eugene, to be exact), and were pretty much unruly in a fun sense. One showgoer got a bit too full of himself, tho', and got posse-ejected out the side door. That was fun to watch. Oh and someone threw a glass tumbler at us which wasn't so cool - thankfully, my cat-like reflexes, earned at the hands of countless sifus over time and geography, prevented catastrophe. I can understand the impulse but come on - a heavy glass tumbler? Think about it, genius - If you intended harm, why'd you stay and throw that at the very end of our set? And if you were just drunk and having a good time, why waste your glass when the bar's about 10 steps away from you? Ah, the nature of playing last, playing late, and playing well.

Because we did play well, considering we hadn't played in about 9 weeks and only had a couple practices prior. "Pabstdrinkers" was dusted off ("Braineaters," if you're interested) and presented to an eager audience, even. And when 'fats fiend Flash tried to call it early we dragged him to the punishment seat at the front of the stage and played on him - not near him, not by him, but on him. I don't think he'll ever get the stank of Baloney's ass or my gut off of him. He's ruined forever now - precisely what he deserves for trying to leave our glorious light before we release him!

Next show is a weeknight affair, back at the Ash in downtown PDX, but very well worth it. Darkbuster returns and reunites with us after our summer success and local heroes iknowkungfu reformed just for this show. Joining us all for this mid-week massacre is The Binge, too. If you're in the area, make it to this 'cuz it's gonna be quite a show (and now add, in the creepy voice of the Men's Wearhouse owner) I guarantee it...