Lyrics - BBQ

Not my best lyrical trans-substantiation, by far, but this one's such a crowd favorite that it doesn't really matter, I soon realized, what lyrics you put to it - so long as you do it w/ utter conviction.

BBQ (tune of Bullet)

Brisket grilling slow on low heat
Rub grill and eat
Brown sugar and soy sauce
Make my sauce sweet
It's fucking meat

Jen is my prep cook, she does it all
Like mashed potato rolls

Texas is a paradise of barbecue
Texas is a nightmare - go there, it's true
One of the reasons that there's good barbecue
You gotta suck, suck, clean-finger suck

Brisket grilling slow on low heat
Rub grill and eat
Brown sugar and soy sauce
Make my sauce sweet
It's fucking meat

Texas is a paradise of barbecue
Tennessee, Carolina, and KC, too
These are the reasons that there's good barbecue
You're gonna suck, suck, clean-finger suck

Arise, people, oh,
Connoisseurs of all things meat
Well arise and be fulfilled
My sauce be your life source
There's ribs for your dessert
And the only way to get 'em
Is to suck, or pump, from me
Oh go ahead and really baste 'em
Really baste 'em
Then slurp it from your palm
Like a dry rib rack soakin' sauce
Soakin' up sauce
Like a dry rib rack soakin' sauce
Soakin' up sauce