Slow On the Uptake

I figured I should try for some consistency in life here and update this with a report from our show at Slabtown last month. I've put it off, though, mainly due to the fact that, boy, did we ever suck...

Being that the show came up just after a holiday weekend we weren't able to schedule a practice closer to the show date. "So," we figured, "we'll just go ahead and play anyway. We've been playing these songs for a number of years and should be fine," our thinking went. Let's just say, after our performance that fateful Wednesday, we're never doing that again. We just felt flat, I felt like I had zero energy, and while the other fellas acquitted themselves well I just blew.

Two things, though, might have been working against us. One was that we went on after The Crimson Ghosts. Now, these guys brought it 100%, playing surf guitar style covers of Misfits tunes, often then joining the crowd in singing along sans mics, and having a ball. They were just plain great and I never realized how upbeat many of the Misfits songs were, when played in that style. Nice guys that truly entertained, I have nothing but good things to say about them. But I think the crowd had sated their Misfits hunger so, when we got up, we're doing many of the same songs they just heard and sang along to and enjoyed by another band. So what were we doing there?

That, at least, seemed to be the attitude. The crowd seemed more "typical Portland" in that they stayed back away from the stage, attentive but with arms crossed and feet firmly planted. After the first couple songs you could've heard crickets, it was that quiet. Now, that happened in Chico in April, too; but a couple songs later and the crowd went nuts. I think we stunned them in more ways that one and they just weren't ready for us to bring it like we did. That wasn't so much the case at Slabtown that night, not by a longshot. Granted, it's not entirely the crowd's fault as I wasn't doing very well and that's going to have some sort of impact. But I did get to the point where I was basically having to heckle myself, just to get some kind of response at all. But not being able to rely on *any* energy from the crowd I just wore out that much more quickly.

Thankfully, there were some high points, too. Long-time fan Zola showed up with his crimson ghost costume and, during our next-to-last song, came out on stage in said costume. Baloney had brought, I think, 10 lbs of salt water taffy. The ghost ended up "distributing" that all over us, the stage, the show floor, the audience, and the bar, I think, by the end. But people seemed to respond well to that and it was pretty fun - necessary at that point, really.

The other "high point" came when Baloney thought it'd be a good idea to, during our 'breakdown' in between our last songs, chug a 2-liter of Hawaiian Punch soda. Somehow he managed to do that but, also, to then throw up both outside and all over the trough urinal inside as well. "I made all the ice in there red!" he proudly proclaimed later. And, surprisingly, the audience called for an encore as we cut our set short since I was dying up there. We weren't sure, tho', if we were actually going to be able to deliver on that as Baloney had run off to think about his mistakes. But, champion that he is, he came back and we wowed 'em all with, "Pabstdrinkers."

Sloppy and outta breath, I think I my performance for once fully matched my look. I apologize if you didn't enjoy us that night. Really, we're not that bad - really!